This is a brief essay from my new newsletter Queeringbeauty.
First of all…..*
Queer people can relate; when we are surrounded by new people in a new space, we become hyper-plugged into what we see and hear in order to determine our safety. Lately, there is an unexpected source of unease for many of us to navigate, and this one is extra troubling because the spaces and the people are familiar. We have to ascertain if we are safe to be critical of Israel. The old clues don’t work; liberals may call you pro-Hamas like they’ve graduated from a Fox News rhetoric class. The result is silence; either because we are gaslit or because we are generally maxed-out, confused or ill-informed by the passive voice and manipulative headlines of the Gray Lady. We have learned that people are indoctrinated into a world view that I once shared. I literally knew nothing of the occupation, and I regret towing the line all those years, just sort of trusting that our government was operating under some morally superior philosophy. I am disappointed in Biden, and I am terrified that the repercussions of his actions (inactions) will lead to a Trump victory and an ensuing loss of queer safety. While Trumpism has a lot in common with Zionism, real antisemitism is on his team too, so we are witness to a dangerous odd-couple; the MAGA Left and the MAGA Right carrying different torches for the same hate.
I’m learning to combat gaslighting with knowledge. Watch the documentary Israelism. Read a lot. Remember when you learned about genocide and you said Never Again. Look up Kent State shootings of 1970. Conversations with Palestinian and Jewish friends have ensured me that the important thing is I remain open to learning, or unlearning. Like so many, I expected and cheered Israel’s retaliation after the horrors of October 7, but after watching the Israeli military’s sustained, disproportionate and maniacal response, we see the xenophobia and racism that lies behind the gaslighting. We are witnessing genocidal fervor from the eye of the hurricane, and some of our friends are being carried away by the winds. In 6 months over 30 thousand dead; over 70,000 wounded; 70 percent of these women and children, worse than the Nakba. Who is this good for?
Anyone who knows my work as a teacher will tell you that my office has always been open to anyone, of any ideology, race or creed. I had students in my office that I never even taught, but they saw a chair and felt welcome. I had students in my office argue with me about gay rights, and they were welcome, and they sat in community with me and a bunch of queerdo choir nerds. If any of my students thought for a second that I would close my door to a Palestinian student, I would have to admit that they didn’t learn what a safe space actually means. Safety is meaningless if you don’t give it to others.
*yes, I condemn Hamas. I cannot accept a bloated definition of antisemitism that includes anyone who speaks of the humanity of Palestinian civilians. So many fools crying all lives matter when they don’t believe Palestinian lives matter. It’s like watching a house burn down and accusing the firehose of being anti-heat. The fire is the problem.